A Rule of Life: How to live well and flourish in Faith

9 August 2026, 5:45pm Evensong - 🧵 How to live well and flourish in Faith!?! - The Revd Canon Andrew Sheard

I Kings 11:41-12:20 & Romans 12:9-18

As those who are regular at Evensong here in the Cathedral will know, over the summer the Honorary Canons have been invited to come and preach on the theme…

Rules to flourish by – how to live well and flourish in faith.

It feels like it could be a bit of a test – secretly is someone is wanting to check up on the Canons? Are they flourishing in faith?? How are they doing??

And then last week, Tom Kennar came and preached. Tom normally publishes his sermons online, so I got to read what he had said. He was cautious about the theme and in fact said…

‘Beware of Church Leaders who give you rules to flourish by’!!

I understand why he says that. The risk is that I am tempted to want to show you just how wise and spiritual I am just in case they are secretly assessing me (!)… and in doing so place I burdens on you that are unhelpful.

So where does that leave us?! Well please treat this sermon with circumspection!! If there is something in it that is helpful – that’s great and it is what I have prayed for… but please don’t let it be a burden for you or cause you guilt.

Personally, I don’t have a ‘Rule of Life’ and in recent years, I don’t even have a Spiritual Director, although I realise I probably should have one! But as I have reflected, I want to offer four things I have learnt through trial and error which have become important to me in the way I try to live with God.

In my early 20s I learnt the value of

‘Living with a Purpose’

When I left university and began a career in marketing, living in London, life was full and fun, social and quite dynamic – enjoyable but not very purposeful. I was already a committed Christian but in my 20s for a while I drifted and my energies were mainly in things that didn’t have lasting value. It was fun but not satisfying to my soul. Then gradually I learnt that life was much richer with a clear sense of purpose and obedience to God. I discovered this by volunteering in a local council run Youth Club in West London and by being involved in Church youth work. The club was an eye opener and a steep learning curve for a middle-class Grammar School boy from the Home Counties. Meeting and getting to know people with very different backgrounds from my own. God taught me a lot and in time this led me towards ordination. I am very thankful that ever since I have lived with a strong sense of purpose from God. Of course, you don’t need to be ordained to live with God-given purpose. All who are baptised into Christ are called with a purpose. Are you conscious of a sense of purpose from God?

However, this sense of purpose can have dangerous side effects, which I learnt to my cost in my 30s. Belatedly I learnt that

‘I am not invincible’

Well, you all know that and I would never have claimed to be, but in retrospect I lived as though I was..

Fast forward and I am now a curate and then Team Vicar in a busy Team Ministry in West London. Unexpectedly my two clergy colleagues both moved for different reasons and I was left to run a Parish that really needed 3 clergy to oversee it. Secretly I quite liked the idea of being the spiritual hero that kept everything going - on reflection I saw myself as like a brave little lifeboat battling through a massive storm to rescue others…

The problem was that after a while my boat began to sink. I worked too hard for too long under considerable pressure and 18 months later I began to sink. Not sunk without trace, but definitely in trouble. I had being unaware of the warning signs and I ended up suffering from depression and feeling I was falling apart inside.

It was a horrible time. I felt incredibly weak and a failure. I just about kept going but behind the scenes I needed help to recover – medical help in the form of anti-depressants for a season, psychological help in the form of counselling, spiritual help in the form of prayer and retreat time.

To flourish, I needed to learn that I had limits and was not invincible - I was not the Saviour of others – Jesus was!! Since then, I have been able to recognise the danger signs for me. I picture them like gauges on a car dashboard. There is an emotional gauge, a physical one, and a spiritual one. I do not want any of those gauges to get stuck in the red nearly empty zone.

We now live with a much greater awareness of mental health. I was fortunate that my experience of mental frailty was a relatively short episode (although I think it took me 2 or 3 years to recover). There will almost certainly be others here who are having struggles with their mental health. In my struggles I learnt that I was not alone. I needed God’s help and he was there for me.

Jesus said to me and he says to us all – ‘Come to me all who are weary’.

As life went on, I learnt another valuable lesson – and that was to

‘Keep short accounts’ with other people as well as with God.

I was passionate about God’s kingdom and wanted the very best for it, but ironically that passion was sometimes counterproductive if it led me into conflict with others. Working closely with colleagues, with key lay leaders and with a PCC can sometimes lead to conflict – any PCC members here recognise this??

I have had to try and learn from Jesus how important it is to graciously resolve conflict when it happens (not ‘if it happens’ but ‘when it happens’)

Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 18 – the ‘Parable of the Unforgiving Servant’ and his instruction about what to do when your brother or sister sins against you, have guided me to move towards conflict with the aim of resolving it, not avoid it and let it fester.

I have grown to appreciate what it says in Romans 12:18

‘If it is possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all people’.

I find conflict to be emotionally and spiritually draining, and slowly I have learnt that when it happens the key is to move towards it and seek to resolve it with humility and love wherever possible… and not to move away, avoid it and let it fester.

I think that ‘keeping short accounts’ is really important for all of us engaged in Christian community. Is there anyone you need to go to?

Finally, I would say that as life has gone on, I have become more aware of the truth that

‘You reap what you sow’

It matters how you treat people. Rehoboam in 1 Kings 12 could have done with understanding that!

If you want loyalty – give loyalty. If you want kindness – give kindness. If you want a loving community – show love.

Saying one thing but living another doesn’t work well. Pretending to be something on the outside, whilst there is a different truth going on inside is costly and damaging to the soul.

For me, I think that daily encounter with God, with Jesus in a quiet place by myself has been life changing and life giving. I am so grateful for the gift of the Holy Spirit working within me – transforming me from the inside out. I dread to think what I would be like without God working in me!! And I am extremely grateful for how gracious God has been to me in healing and cleansing my brokenness and sin.

Live with purpose, remember you are not invincible, keep short accounts, you reap what you sow.

Everyday is not a flourishing day – there are still plenty of struggles along the way, but Jesus says I believe to be true…

‘Abide in me as I abide in you. Just as the branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine, neither can you unless you abide in me…. Those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit, because apart from me you can do nothing’